In his first letter to the Corinthians, Paul writes, “for the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power.” [1 Cor 4:20] The kingdom of God is not just speech; not just words and knowledge and things such as that. For again, we read in Corinthians, “knowledge puffeth up, but charity edifieth.” [1 Cor 8:1] And further, also regarding love, John writes, “my little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.” [1 Jn 3:18] Truly, love is not love if it remains in speech only. For love to be more than just a concept, for it to be of substance, it must come out in action as well. The true love of God is proved in action. As Paul told the Corinthians in his second letter, “…prove the sincerity of your love,” which in context was admonition to give an offering. [2 Cor 8:8] We see that love is base and unprofitable without actions paired to it; even as we know of faith. For James writes,
“What doth it profit, my brethren, though a man say he hath faith, and have not works? can faith save him? If a brother or sister be naked, and destitute of daily food, and one of you say unto them, depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body; what doth it profit? Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.” [Jam 2:14-17]
There is no blessing in our faith or our love if those remain but words and but knowledge. We may speak of love or of faith, we may accumulate affections for their concepts and truths; we may know much of what is written of them in God’s Holy Word, but do we practice them? For we see that the true blessing lies within the doing of these things; as Jesus told us, “if ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them.” [Jn 13:17]
We may further extend this concept to righteousness, peace, and joy. For if we are told, “the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power,” we see then that our righteousness, peace, and joy must also come to be more than just talk. For The Holy Spirit writes, “for the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.” [Rom 14:17]
No matter what we find ourselves doing in life, the proof of our faithfulness, of our spirituality, of our love, or of anything that is good and godly, will be in the fruit. It will be contained in the actions and power, not only in the word. Let us remember what Christ Jesus said,
“A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth forth not good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.” [Mt 7:18-19]
See then that it is the fruit which is counted; as in the parable our Lord gave, wherein He told of “a certain main [who] had a fig tree planted in his vineyard; and he came and sought fruit thereon, and found none,” and which then provoked the man to say, “cut it down; why cumbereth it the ground?” [Lk 13:6-7] We can see then that it is the fruit and actions of a life which are counted, and those lives which produce nothing, regardless of how outwardly beautiful or comely of a voice they have, will ultimately be cut down, not having produced their desired and intended fruit.
In marriage, this concept holds firm. One can say, ‘I love, I love!,’ but the reality is what counts. Just as many in judgment day will say “Lord, Lord,” but at the last, when their fruits and works are weighed in the balance, like The LORD spoke to Belshazzar, they will be “found wanting,” and Christ shall say to them, “I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.” [Dan 5:27, Mt 7:21-23] We conclude then, that these supposed Christians indeed had profession: they spoke to Christ, ‘Lord,’ but they were in reality those that practice iniquity and sin; their talk was only that and Christ never truly knew them nor had fellowship with them. See then the comparison to marriage, and let us not be husbands who have vainly professed upon that joyous day, ‘I will’ and ‘I love,’ but hardly can show any proof of those statements. Instead, we must strive to prove and fulfil our love in deed and in truth.
One of the greatest proofs of a husband’s love to his wife, is his wife. Just as Paul wrote to the Corinthians,
“If I be not an apostle unto others, yet doubtless I am to you: for the seal of mine apostleship are ye in The Lord.” [1 Cor 9:2]
And again,
“Do we begin again to commend ourselves? Or need we, as some others, epistles of commendation to you, or letters of commendation from you? Ye are our epistles written in our hearts, known and read of all men. Forasmuch as ye are manifestly declared to be the epistle of Christ ministered by us, written not with ink, but with the Spirit of the Living God; not in tables of stone, but in fleshly tables of the heart.” [2 Cor 3:1-3]
The proof of Paul’s apostleship and leadership was not his speech; it was not his lofty knowledge or glorious revelations from The Lord. No, but his proof was the Corinthian church themselves. They were, as he said, “our epistles written in our hearts, known and read of all men.” The Corinthians themselves were the apostles’ epistles; that is, that which Paul taught and exemplified to them, was replicated and reflected in their lives, so that one might look at a Corinthian Christian and see just what Paul preached, taught, and showed. Paul may have very well written books upon books of what is good Christianity, what is good apostleship, what is good leadership: but as he said to that church, “for the seal of mine apostleship are ye in The Lord.” The Corinthians were the proof, the seal, and the true epistle of Paul. Were they blessed by his presence? Were they changed? Did his preaching, teaching, and lifestyle have any manifest difference in their life? Or was it in the end just talk? The proof that Paul was an excellent Christ-ordained leader in that church was the church itself: that is, it was flourishing, growing, learning, and becoming more like Jesus.
In a similar way, the proof of a good husband is the wife. Does not it say regarding Christ and His church that He,
“Loved the church, and gave Himself for it; that He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that He might present it to Himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.”? [Eph 5:25-27]
Through this, we see that Jesus, our true husband, makes us better, and is not content to leave us just as He found us. Through being His bride, we as the church and as His body, continue to grow. He continues to sanctify us, to purify us, and to help us grow. We continue to become more mature. And so, seeing that a marriage between a man and a wife should be a reflection of Jesus’ relationship with His church, a good husband – one like Jesus – will make his wife better. The proof then of his good nature and excellent marriage, will be that his wife is growing in purity, in love, in meekness, in gentleness, in inward beauty, etc. As it is written regarding the man who “feareth The LORD; that walketh in His ways,”
“Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table. Behold, that thus shall the man be blessed that feareth The LORD.” [Psa 128:1, 3-4]
Truly, the mark of a good husband, of a man who fears God and behaves himself as Christ in his marriage, is his wife. Does she bear much fruit? Is she growing in Godly characteristics? Or has she become dull, sorrowful, apathetic, weak, bitter, complaining, and angry? If a man has found his wife so to be, the first eye and finger ought to look and point to himself; for just as the Corinthian church was the proof of Paul’s apostleship, so too our wives are the proof of our husbandly role.